Thoughts from the Happy Fat Guy

Thanksgiving, a time for friends, family and food. Unfortunately, often in the rush of the holiday the meaning is lost. We spend our time preparing meals, preparing homes and getting ready for the dreaded “black Friday”. We may take time to say a quick prayer before the meal. Some families may even take a minute to say what they are thankful for. But really, how much time do we spend on Thanksgiving being thankful? I’d like to take a moment to tell you some of the things I am thankful for.

I am thankful that I was given a new lease on life. This surgery has literally been a life-altering process. It has allowed me to take control of my life in a way I never thought possible. I have made changes and seen progress in just ten weeks that I could not have imagined. Not to mention that due to the risk factors in my life as well as my newly discovered liver issues, this surgery is literally a life-saving experience. None of this would have been possible without Dr. Wallace and his staff. A staff that has walked with me every step of the way and been there for anything I needed. That applies to everyone in the practice. From Dr. Wallace, Deb and Nedra who have addressed every medical concern I’ve had all the way to Keri who handled the endless paperwork and insurance requirements. She was the first person I ever spoke to in the office and to this day is one of the nicest people I’ve never met.

I am thankful for family and friends that have been nothing but supportive. For co-workers who picked up the slack while I was out and now show genuine interest in my daily well-being. A pastor, who has become a great friend as well. For this Web site and the support and concern shown by those who have left feedback. For the opportunity that writing this blog has given me to touch the lives of others. We were put in each others paths to take this journey toward health and wellness by a God who knows what I need before I do. A father who tells me frequently how proud he is of me and the progress I am making. A wife who loved me when there was a lot more of me to love and continues to love me as we struggle and make these changes to our family.

I have a challenge now for all of you who are reading this. Take the time this year to truly reflect on what you are thankful for. Then, take some action. Say a prayer, not just a quick “Grace” but a real prayer of thanks. Pick up a phone, give someone a hug. Make sure that those for whom you are thankful know it. Don’t just assume they know. With each day we are given the opportunity to touch the lives of those around us. Make sure that for at least this day you take the steps needed to do this. And then, begin taking those steps every day.

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The following is feedback received for this blog: Scott: I think your blog is great. I especially liked the last line of your most recent blog, which should remind all of us, those who need to lose 10 pounds, 25 pounds, 60 pounds, or 100 pounds or more, that it needs to be a daily thing. You have to decide every day that you will do it right. Messing up one day doesn't blow the whole plan. Too many people see the big picture (60 pounds) and forget to look at the daily walk--the 1/2 pound or pound a week, or simply NOT gaining this week--that is necessary to achieve the bigger goal. Thank you for your transparency and your willingness to share your journey. It is an encouragement to many. -GR

I recently heard another weight loss surgery patient say, “I didn’t realize how much I would miss my old friend food.” I certainly can sympathize with that feeling. As much as I thought I was prepared for this surgery, you really don’t know how you will react until you wake up in recovery. One of the first post-op feelings I remember is the crushing realization that there are simply things I will never eat and enjoy again. I thought I had dealt with that prior to the surgery. Until I was post-op though, the finality of this wasn’t a reality.     

Consider the statement though, "I miss my old friend food." If I am honest, I have to look at everything my old friend food brought to the table. In my case, it made me obese my entire adult life. At 36 years old, I was 373lbs and a Big Mac away from a heart attack. I had health problems up the whazoo, (literally if you count the hemorrhoids). I was fat, lazy and felt like crap most of the time. On top of that, I found out that my obesity was causing liver disease that would have led to liver failure eventually. 

What would you do with a friend that lied, cheated, and stole from you? At a minimum you would want them out of your life for good. That is exactly what food has done to me. It lied to me about what it was really doing to me with misleading advertisement and false, misplaced comfort. It cheated me of the true enjoyment of living every day. It stole time and years from my life. And it robbed me of so many experiences with my family.   

Now, that doesn't mean I don't miss my "friend."  Just like anyone that has been a part of our lives for so long, we miss them. But when I am really missing my old friend, I’m learning to ask myself this question, do I miss the destructiveness that it has rained down on my life? I truly cannot think of one positive thing that this friend has done in my life. I have to consider the consequences of opening the door for that friendship again.  

If I need inspiration to maintain a healthy perspective on the importance of food in my life, I need look no further than myself.  Pants that were once too tight for me to wear are now so big they slide down. For the first time in fifteen years I ran one mile, without stopping. I can look at a picture or mirror and see what it looks like to lose 62 pounds in only eight weeks. And I am beginning to understand that the purpose of food is to give nourishment, energy, and yes, some enjoyment. But I have control over food; it is not supposed to have control over me. 

I'll share with you what I see. The first photo collage below is me before on the left and me eight weeks post-op. Down 62 pounds.



And here is a progressive collage. Same photos of me on the left and right and me two weeks post-op in the middle.

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The following is feedback received for this blog: Hey Scott, Congrats on the 60+ pounds. That is great and I know what you mean about feeling great. I am at 45 lbs - but I am a girl!! We go as a family to the Y and that is fun but that stupid elipitical - I am up to 8 whole minutes!! Running a mile - way too cool!! The pictures are fantastic. I bet your clothes are falling off too! Take care and keep up the good work!! - DIANE TENDLER You look GREAT! Keep it up and thanks for sharing with us. --Jen

Here we are at seven weeks and there has been another milestone. Two weeks ago, I returned to work. I have to say that it was an experience I was not completely prepared for. I knew that my return was coming. I thought I was ready for it. I was beginning to develop the new habits I needed after the surgery. There were certainly no complications that concerned me. 

But then, a couple of days before my return, I had this uneasy feeling. Was I really ready to go back? Was I prepared for this next step? I didn't feel so sure now. Regardless of my unease, it was time. That morning, I was greeted with compliments and questions. How do I feel, how did everything go, how much had I lost? The concern and encouragement from my coworkers was welcome. 

But then, that familiar feeling came back. To understand this feeling, you have to know how I ate at work before. I grazed all day. A granola bar here, a pack of doughnuts there. Whenever hunger pings came, I snacked on something. And then, regardless of whether I ate lunch or not, I almost always stopped and had some type of fast food on the way home. Bad enough if that was replacing supper, but in my case, it was a snack in addition to supper.

While I was home, I wasn't feeling those hunger pings. I ate my three meals and was content and full. The day I returned to work, the pings returned. On the way home, as I passed each fast food restaurant, I felt this feeling of hunger. My head was telling me, "You can stop and get a grilled chicken, something healthy." I had to stop myself and think about it. There was no physical way I could be hungry. I had eaten lunch just an hour ago. And if I wasn't hungry two days ago after eating, I certainly wasn't hungry now.

It is amazing the tricks our head can play with us. Dr. Wallace was able to alter the body, but I have to remember that he wasn't able to do anything to my head. And that is where most of my problems started in the first place. That I have to work on changing myself.

Now, for my new found weight-loss motivator. As a part of surgery, Dr. Wallace does a liver biopsy. The results of mine were less than glowing. Dr. Wallace told me the results showed that I had something called, "Nonalcoholic steatohepatitis or NASH". This is a fancy way of saying that I had fatty liver syndrome. On one hand, how can I be surprised by this? I had fatty belly and fatty butt syndrome, so fatty liver just makes sense. But unlike the other two, fatty liver could lead to my death. Fatty liver can lead to non-alcohol cirrhosis of the liver. Once this has set in, the only fix is a liver transplant. I was assured by the specialist that this was the road I was on.

The scary part is that without the liver biopsy, I would never have known about this problem until it was too late to do anything about it. It does not show up on blood work or other testing. So, without this surgery I probably would have never known until this took a drastic turn for the worst.

So what is the fix? Thankfully I found out that it is what I have begun to do already. Lose weight, a lot of it. Check. Eat healthier and well-balanced meals. Check. Lead a more active lifestyle. Check.

As I found out, there is no pill to fix this, no treatment to change it. Drastic weight loss and lifestyle changes are the only real treatment for NASH. The specialist told me that this is very common in weight-loss surgery patients. But he also told me that he frequently sees this disease begin to correct itself if these things are done. So, as if I needed another motivator to succeed, here it is.

And for those of you who are wondering, seven weeks out, down just over 60 pounds.

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The following is feedback received for this blog: Congratulations on the 60lb loss. I wish you continued success! Hi Scott, I have been keeping up with your progress and I have to say I am a little bumbed out by your liver diagnosis. I am two years post op also with the liver diagnosis. But, as you said you are on the right track. I just wanted to say I get through each day by trying to maintain a positive attitude. I feel better than I have in years, so I won't let a little thing like this diagnosis get me down. Take care of yourself and Good luck!