Sexual Healing by Dr. Margarita Kressin

This is Harriet’s story.

"I am a 58-year-old woman, with a great husband, four kids, seven grandchildren. I love being retired with my husband: we golf, we dance, we cook. Life is wonderful.

"Then he comes home with the little blue pill. What the devil?! I thought we had an understanding. We haven’t had sex for the last five years. We used to have a fulfilling sex life, and I did enjoy it. But after menopause, I just lost interest. He stopped asking after a while. Our life, I thought, was fulfilling enough.

"And then he messes it up by bringing home this pill. I don’t even know if this will work. I don’t know if I’ll work. I’m scared, I’m confused. I think he actually wants us to have sex tonight."

The story continues …

This is a very common scene in my office. A man, about 65, comes to the office — let’s call him George — and during our conversation he is asked about sexual function. He says that his erections are no longer the way they used to be, and they don’t last as long anymore. When asked when the last time they had had sexual intercourse: "Oh, maybe 6 months ago. The Mrs. is not that interested."

I asked if he would like to try some PDE-5 inhibitors (Viagra, Levitra, Cialis). So he is given some samples, a prescription, and he goes home.

I see him six months later, and I asked how the sexual activity is going on at home. He says he tried the pill once, and he hasn’t filled the prescription.

Did it not work? Was it too expensive? Were there terrible side effects?

Let’s wait for his wife’s (Harriet) view on the subject.

Fred came into my office quite distressed. He was in a new relationship and things were progressing well. He and his partner have decided to take their relationship to the next level. Just as things were getting hot and heavy, a scene reminiscent of a particular moment in American Pie happened — without the video camera and the whole student body watching.

It’s never happened to me before. I didn’t do anything different or crazy. We tried again later and it happened again.

Premature ejaculation. It is a common condition which can be caused by both psychological and biological factors. Treatment is therefore achieved best with medication and psychological and behavioral intervention.

In this particular case, the condition resolved by itself after the patient settled into the relationship and his anxiety abated. It certainly helped that he had a partner that was open, patient, and non-judgmental. In the process, they learned all about sexual communication ... that’s a story for another time.