Sexual Healing by Dr. Margarita Kressin

I eat, therefore I run. This is the mantra written on my RoadID tag on my running shoe. What does this have to do with sex?

I have been listening to several podcasts during my runs on health, weight loss, nutrition. There are common themes as anyone would guess: eat right, get enough sleep, get regular health checks, watch your stress, and exercise. The one thing that people have a hard time doing, I think, is the last one. Each of these is linked one way or another and each contribute to the benefit or demise of each one. For example, when we are stressed we eat badly (or emotionally — chocolate anyone?) and sleep fitfully. When we don’t sleep well, we don’t have the energy sometimes to work out. When we don’t work out, we gain weight and then stress out about that. Then we don’t like to see our doctor because we have gained weight since our last visit, and our blood pressure is up because of the stress. You get the picture.

However, I have been known to be a cockeyed optimist and so the converse of the above is true. When we eat healthy, we feel better. When we have less stress, we sleep better. I am a big believer of moving. I think the word exercise sometimes makes people stress out. But I think it is my duty as a healthcare provider to ask what they are doing to move. It doesn’t come easy for anyone. But it has to be done as part of a healthy lifestyle. Cutting down on calories and eating healthy is great, don’t get me wrong, but we all have cravings and we can only avoid bacon and chocolate only so much (my particular downfall). But moving allows us to have an occasional craving (or two), lets us sleep well, keeps our weight down, and is a great stress reliever. Moving makes us feel good, endorphins are released, and if the side effect is a little weight loss, most of us will tolerate this. It is indisputable that all of the above makes us feel good and makes us feel better about ourselves, our bodies, ergo more sexy. This phenomenon has been reported in studies and by my patients’ own personal experience, regardless of whether weight loss actually occurred.

So maybe the next shoe tag should read: I run therefore I have sex.

This conversation really happened and although it appears I am eaves dropping, I really am not. I just can’t reveal how I got this conversation and the people’s identities have been changed.

There were four ladies lunching, who we will call Charlotte, Carrie, Samantha, and Miranda. Charlotte was complaining how her husband Harry was always asking for sex. She just had a baby and she’s exhausted and she still feels heavy with post-baby weight, and she was annoyed that he was bugging her to have sex.

Carrie the ever supportive friend tried to console Charlotte. “Of course you’re exhausted, sweetie. And you look fantastic. You don’t even look like you have post-baby weight.”

Miranda then piped in, “At least he is lusting after you and not another woman. What’s wrong with your husband's wanting to have sex with his wife.”

Samantha joined in, “Oh, Honey, it’s great he’s still after you. You just need a little waxing to feel sexy and in the mood.”

I’m not saying women shouldn’t say “no” to a little romance from time to time, but isn’t it great that the husband is still into his wife?

With two studies released about a month ago regarding prostate cancer screenings and their utility, I am still making an announcement that our department is again giving free prostate checks on Thursday, May 28, at Miller Park.

There is too much to explain regarding the analysis of those two studies on this blog. I will say this: Despite the studies, the American Urological Association subsequently came out in support of the screenings for "asymptomatic men 40 years of age or older who have a life expectancy of at least 10 years." And I am hoping that men who have a history of prostate cancer or African-American men will come and get a free prostate and PSA check. These are still life-saving and relatively benign tests.

A patient told me once that she would like to continue to be sexually active because she had a psychological need to be connected with her husband. I was pleasantly surprised because of her candidness, her honesty, and frankly, I had never had anyone express this particular reason to me before. My patient is over the age of fifty and has been married over twenty five years.

I have certainly heard other reasons:

• My husband is still quite virile and I want to keep up.
• I would like to still be physical with my husband.
• My husband misses it.
• I miss it.
• It makes me feel good.
• My husband might divorce me if I don’t do something. (My favorite ... I’m being facetious.)
• I love my husband and I want to continue this.
• We have a good marriage except this part.
• I want to continue to please my husband.
• My husband wants me to enjoy this too.

I think what impressed me was her articulation of sex beyond the physical. Her comment has clearly stuck with me.

I always counsel my patients that the brain is the biggest sex organ and sometimes we have to fix things from the top down. It’s more than just the vagina or penis or things working or not. It’s even more than just a feeling. It’s a psych thing.

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The following is feedback received for this blog: Great post. New to your blog, but you got great writing style. You had some very interesting points that I liked. Looking forward to more of your thoughts. - Singing Bowl Crystal

This article was in the recent AUA Daily Scope (and apparently, Grey’s Anatomy)

Urologists explain penile fractures after injury is featured on TV show. ABC News (1/23, Friedman) reported that, after being featured on an episode of the television show "Grey's Anatomy," many are asking if penile fractures are real. "The answer, unfortunately, is a definite yes."

Explaining penile fractures, Dr. Darius Paduch, a urologist at New York Presbyterian-Weill Cornell Medical Center, who "treats around four fractured penises a year, said that penile fractures are usually accompanied by a 'popping sound' and then an immediate loss of erection for the man."
 
Dr. Ira Sharlip, spokesman for the American Urological Association, elaborates "that in addition to the popping sound that occurs at the time of injury, the penis will also be swollen and quite painful."
 
Dr. Paduch warns, however, that "sex isn't the only way a man can break his penis." In fact "any time the penis is hit while erect, damage can occur."
 
Still, Dr. Sharlip, "who also practices urology at the University of California San Francisco," emphasized, "It's important to remember this is a minor injury because it's repairable and that men can go completely back to normal after surgery."

My message to guys out there is that if this happens, it is an emergency and they need to go to the hospital or make an appointment to see a urologist ASAP. They should not wait to see if the penis will repair itself. The fracture needs to be repaired surgically. This is often successful to restore function without any consequences. The key is that it needs surgical intervention ... sooner rather than later.